I am planning to take a break and step ‘off the grid’ for most if not all of the next week. Before I do I wanted to thank you for listening and for the messages and prayers of support I’ve received. I truly credit those prayers for keeping me upright for the last couple of years.

You may be wondering, why a blog, and why now?
Well, I have been tortured with these events, and believe me, you’ve only heard a portion at this point…

I had increasingly felt frustrated and unable to move forward toward healing with the many loose ends and injustices that took place, especially with public agencies.

Howard County has 2 excellent candidates running for County Executive in the election next week. I know and like them both personally from their help with the getting anti-bullying policies/law made. Courtney Watson was the first to take action by introducing an anti-bullying resolution at the County Council level, and Allan Kittleman worked hard and included our family every step of the way in ushering Grace’s Law through the Maryland legislature.

I was disappointed to hear that they were running against each other! I’d mentioned this to Ms. Watson at one point, and she told me that I should just stay neutral. I never intended to choose between the two….

…But a couple of weeks ago, while feeling agitated with events, I decided to write to them both about our situation. I said:

“….At present, I increasingly find myself at odd ends, frustrated with many facets of what happened, and truly continues to happen, in relation to our struggle to help and save Grace, and honor her memory. While I know you both know some pieces about what happened, I would really like to share with you someday, more deeply the story, especially given that one of you will soon be in charge of overseeing the agencies which hurt and failed us.

Ken U. was gracious to us, and looked into the situation after things began to unravel in public at the first Ray Rice Anti-bullying Rally…. He then invited us to meet with him and Chief McMahon (whom I really liked).After hearing our story and seeing our documents, they both actually said “We failed”, which I really appreciated for the candor, and we were able to meet with personnel from the police department and the states attorneys office, as they told us that no charges (rape, harassment or otherwise) would be filed, which of course we were deeply disappointed about.
At that time, though we were in no way ready mentally or emotionally, we were able to pose questions about why things were handled the way they were (poorly) and frankly the answers we got (or failed to get) bother me still on a regular basis. I am left feeling like we were really, truly and deeply wronged, and deserve at the very least, a discussion and perhaps a public admission and apology.
Am I crazy to think that this is possible? “

Allan Kittleman responded almost immediately:


I am getting ready to leave for a candidate forum in Ellicott City…but after seeing your email, I wanted to sent you a quick message. You are not crazy to expect a discussion and even a public apology for all that has happened to Grace, you and your family.

I have tremendous respect for you and everyone in your family. Should I be elected in November, I will make it a priority to meet with you and Dave to discuss what can be done.

Of course, even if I am not elected, please do not hesitate to let me know if there is anything I can do for you.

Take care,

I heard nothing from Courtney Watson.

I let a few days go by and asked on her Facebook page if she’d gotten my message. She replied she couldn’t locate the e-mail and to please send again, so I did… and again heard nothing.
A couple days later I mailed back asking for confirmation that it had been received.
Four days later at 9pm I got a call from her aide, who essentially said they thought I should take the issue up with Ken Ulman, and that Chief McMahon was now retired etc., etc.

I was really surprised. I’d at least thought she would and SHOULD be interested in knowing what happened, especially so it Never. Happens. Again.

I filled out my absentee ballot today. Guess who I voted for?

Oh! And don’t forget to write in ‘Grace McComas’ for Howard County States Attorney please.

VOTE!  for Grace and Allan

for Grace and Allan